The Spoon is Spinning

moving out

2006-02-24T18:32:00.000-08:00

sekarang ke sini aja yah:
http://politicaltears.multiply.com/

lebih rame, foto-foto, tulis-tulis.

c'ya there.

politicaltears.

in fear 2 [tamat]

2006-01-06T04:32:00.000-08:00

sebagai orang Indonesia, harusnya bom dan ancaman-ancamannya nggak aneh lagi.
beberapa hari yang lalu, sepulang kerja, langsung ke stasiun.
kalo biasanya nyampe stasiun nggak pernah klop jadwalnya alias harus nunggu beberapa menit,
kali ini pas, 2 menit lagi kereta jalan.
setelah lari tergopoh-gopoh, turun eskalator lelompatan, dan langsung masuk gerbong, tanpa sempet milih-milih
mau duduk dimana, ah, lumayan juga yang penting nggak missed, daripada nunggu 10 menit lagi.

nah, begitu duduk, siap-siap menyamankan diri dengan beberapa alat bantu kecuekan di kereta,
ipod lamat-lamat, majalah, dan kacamata hitam sudah pada tempatnya masing-masing, mata terganggu dengan percakapan
4 orang [tidak mengenal satu sama lain], tentang sebuah tas. mata mereka mengarah ke titik yang sama.

ternyata oh ternyata, mereka ngomongin tentang tas yang tergeletak begitu aja, tak ada pemiliknya.
sebagainya kota yang katanya jadi salah satu sasaran bom alqaeda, tentunya mereka parno setengah mati.
ditambah lagi dengan kampanye-kampanye di public transport, seperti "if you see something, say something", terutama buat unattended bag, gerak gerik mencurigakan, dll.
sebagainya anak Jakarta [loh?], tadinya yang mau nyantai aja sambil dalam hati bilang, "ah bom mah biasa!", jadi serem juga.
beberapa bom yang udah kejadian di Jakarta, sejauh ini, memang belum ada dampak langsung, karena emang nggak ada di tempat kejadian, dan waktu itu nggak ikutan nengok ke tempat kejadian. jadi berempati dari kejauhan aja.

tapi kali ini, si tas tak bertuan itu, beneran cuman berjarak nggak lebih dari 5 meter.
kalo beneran bom dan meledak, agak kurang lucu juga.
tapi sempet merasa semua indera, ngebayangin kalo itu beneran bom yang bakal meledak kurang dari 10 menit ke depan dan dekat sekali jaraknya. sambil berfantasi, sambil setengah pikiran sadar di kenyataan. oh belum, belum meledak. oh bakalan turun, 2 stop lagi.

dan lagi asik mikirin, duh bakalan meledak sebelum nyampe stasiun gue atau nggak sih?
kalo iya, mesti ngirim sms nih. kalo nggak, ntar koran-koran itu kurang berita.
kalo beneran bakalan mati karena bom, duh gimana ya.
tiba-tiba seorang petugas security pun muncul dan "ngejemput" tas itu.
tapi tetep tas itu ada di dalam kereta.
kalo meledak pas dia pegang gimana?

dan nggak lama, sampai lah di stasiun tujuan.
turun.
dan nggak ada ledakan.
sampe rumah.
ngelempar badan ke sofa bed.
dan masih hidup.

in the mood of fears

2006-01-04T03:18:00.000-08:00

another year has been killed
precious dramas
thrilling journey
smooth slap on face
unforgettable picture of moments
all have left behind

a new year has just started
another year that has to be killed
fear
and fears

back to the box of an unexpected surprises
start from scratch all over again
getting ready for harder slap on face

but hey who knows
possibly it's gonna be a year of an unforgettable fears

deserve

2005-12-12T04:03:00.000-08:00

deserve or not deserve
kata ini lumayan absurd

di umur semuda ini [uuy], gue seringnya nggak deserve ini itu
belum layak ngomong ini itu
nggak deserve perlakuan ini itu
nggak deserve dapet ini itu karena nggak kerja cukup keras
pokoknya banyak lah hal-hal yang gue nggak deserve

kemarin ini gue ngerasa bahwa gue deserve sesuatu dari australian government!
penalty tax gue yang jumlahnya kalo buat beli kerupuk [oh kangen kerupuk putih, yang kadang-kadang ada juga versi kuning dan pink muda nya], nggak bakal abis sampe Jakarta nggak macet lagi,
sudah gue rebut kembali!

kerja siang malem pagi sampe pagi lagi, kalo cuman buat bayar denda tax, ampunilah
gue yang datang dari negara dunia ketiga ini, masak sih dirampok sama kangguru ini
money does matter, tapi gue bukan money eater, makanya waktu disuruh bayar denda, gue bayar aja, daripada ditangkep polisi, tapi berkat "kerelaan" dan terus berusaha, gue deserve ini.

kali ini gue ngerasa deserve.
deserve emang karena usaha atau bisa deserve karena emang deserve dateng begitu aja?
apa sih.

tadi malam, tadi pagi

2005-12-04T22:01:00.000-08:00

I : Jadi tadi malem ngapain?
S: Nongkrong di jalanan, Collins Street.

I : Outlet Ticketmaster ya?
S: Iyalah, dari jam 11 malem.

I : Ck ck, gigih sekali, pasti tiket konser U2 ya?
S: Situ bener banget. Untungnya nongkrongnya nggak sendirian.

I : Oh, banyak yang rela nunggu semaleman gitu?
S: Wuihhh, banyak banget. Dateng jam 11 aja udah banyak yang ngantri.

I : Emangnya loketnya buka jam berapa?
S: 9 pagi tadi.

I : [nyembah2] Jadi nunggu hampir 12 jam?
S: Situ pinter ngitungnya. Tapi ini katanya nggak seberapa dibanding waktu KISS main di sini, ngantrinya 3 hari 2 malem.

I : Jadi semalem bareng siapa aja?
S: Sebagian besar backpackers gitu lah, sebagian besar Irish, tapi banyak juga yang Australian nya. Rame lah. Kami bersenang-senang kok, nyanyi sana sini, minum sana sini. Sempet ngantuk berat, untung bawa sleeping bag, jadi sempet tidur bentar. Irish-irish itu seru banget, berisik, dan ramah-ramah, padahal saya ini satu-satunya Asia malem itu. Lucunya, tiap ada orang lewat, dan nanya kami ini ngantri apa, semua kompak bilang, ngantri tiket Lion King Theatre. Bwahahaha.

I : Wah seru! Emang nggak banyak yang tau ya kalo U2 bakalan show di Melbourne?
S: Kayaknya nggak deh. Soalnya mereka nggak pasang poster dan di tv, iklannya juga cuma flash in gitu, kalo rajin ngikutin website ticketmaster, nah baru tuh ngeh. Lucunya, tadi pagi pas lagi pada goleran di trotoar gitu, ada orang Taiwan lewat dan nanya, "Kalian ngantri apa?" Kali ini kami jawab jujur, konser U2. Dia nanya balik,"Itu band atau apa yah?" Semua ngangguk sambil males. Eh tetep dia nanya balik,"Bagus nggak band nya?"

I : Jam berapa mulai bergegas?
S: Jam 5 pagi udah nggak bisa tidur. Padahal baru tidur sejam. Gara-gara jalanan kan dibersihin tuh jam segitu, tuh sikat mesin segede Tokyo pas banget di depan muka. Bangun deh. Herannya Irish-Irish itu masih cespleng aja.

I : Seru yah! Akhirnya dapet dong tiketnya?
S: Dapet dong. Beli beberapa buat temen-temen yang nitip juga. Untungnya satu orang bisa beli 8 tiket. Tadi beli 6. Begitu langit terang, baru nyadar ternyata antriannya udah hampir 1 blok. Nggak seberapa sih, mungkin kebanyakan orang beli on line. Tapi saya nggak ada kartu kredit, jadi manual aja. Lagian menyenangkan sekali!

I : Kapan sih konsernya?
S : Nanti akhir Maret 2006. Di Telstar Dome, guede banget tempatnya, makanya denger-denger, U2 bawa peralatan sampe 32 kontainer yang dikirim lewat laut. Makin penasaran.

I : Emang situ suka banget yah sama U2?
S : Sebenernya belakangan ini udah nggak kena lagi ya dengerin U2. Tapi kalo ada kesempatan ngeliat live, wah nggak boleh di skip itu.

I : Ya udah, selamat menikmati konsernya ya!
S: Sama-sama ya, kan nontonnya bareng situ juga.

I : Oh iyah.
S: ... ... ...

I =istrinya
S =suaminya

broke my heart

2005-11-19T18:01:00.000-08:00

as it is something that always connected to relationship between man and woman in the name of the word "L" [in narrow minded way], but not at this time for me. keep reading.

anyway, as I and several groups of friends, we're at the same age, between 25-30, it's just about time that we'll exchange wedding invitations between us at this year or few ahead. i am married and witnessing best friends married afterwards, is just something that will always amaze me. a friend said, it's not suppose to be a big thing anymore for me since i've done it.

but it's not the way it is, is it? when you've been in such excitement and when other people are about to do it, it is really really possible that you'll feel the same excitement for the second time. and if you think that you deserve to be part of the excitement but in fact you're not even close to it, it's just sucks, isn't it? nothing you can do anyway, you can't nag and drag and carry on, upset, and stuff, you just have to stop whining and calmly describe your feeling and try to understand and except it. but it's just broke your heart, isn't it? agree?!! say yes! [why i'm being such a pushy bitch!]

few days ago, i got an offline message from my goodest friend. it's written that this guy [a friend of us], has just got married a week ago. since it was an offline message, impatiently i buzzed him, and of course he wasn't there. normally, i will just stop being such an annoying -want-to-know- person. but, that time i couldn't. so as i always do, i managed to reconfirm everything, and got the final answer. yes, he's got married a week ago.

and it's just broke my heart. no, no, it's not like that. we've never been in such relationship. if we used to be boyfriend girlfriend, probably it would be much easier for me to except it. "oh that looser bastard managed to find the girl! good luck for the girl!" hahaha, you know those bitchy [and fun] kinda feelings sometimes unavoidably popping in your mind. but it's different, so we weren't in such relationship thingy. we are good friend.

we both have a totally different personality, different background, a lot differences. he always be the smartest and i am of course the opposite. he's read those intellectual books, and me still stuck with the teen magazine. he's completly clueless about how to start approaching and dating those girls, and i am the expert. yet we're a good friend. shortly, he was there when i was growing up [20-25]. that's the highlight.

so, i'm happy for him, he's got married, move on to another step, another work [you know marriage is actually another work, with different model of problem]. it's just broke my heart that i knew this not directly from him. broke my heart.

sleep talking

2005-10-20T05:05:00.000-07:00

in these past months i've been sleep talking a lot.
adit always laughs at the next morning when he is telling me what happened at the night before.
it happens mostly when i fall asleep at the couch.
may be it was because i didn't sleep that well or whatever.
the funny thing is, even i was sleeping, when adit asked me questions, i could answer.
i don't have that much explanations though, may be i should go to doctor or counsellor.

it would be more funny if i wrote in Indonesian as it happened.
so, for non native speaker, just buzz me, i'll translate it for you.

tragedy one
Him: "Yuk, pindah ke kamar, udah malem"
Me: "Nggak ah, es nya belum jadi!"
H: "Es apaan?"
M: "Es ya es batu!"
H: "Es batu apa?"
M: "Es batu di kulkas belum jadi, aku nggak mau pindah ke kamar!"

tragedy two
H: "Aku udah selesai, yuk pindah ke kamar!"
M: "Nggak ah, dingin!"
H: "Ya makanya pindah ke kamar!"
M: "Nggak, kakiku dingin!"
H: "Kenapa dingin?"
M: "Kakinya dicelupin ke es krim!"
H: "Maksudnya?"
M [sambil marah]: "Kakiku dingin, soalnya aku celupin ke es krim!!!"

tragedy three
at this time we didn't sleep in the bed room, decided to crashed on sofa bed.
so there was no drama to drag me to the bed room.
Adit has just finished with his assignment and jumped on beside me.
M: "Itu astronot!"
H: "Astronot apa?"
M: "Tadi astronot dateng, ada 5 orang!"
H: "Astronot siapa?"
M: "Yah astronot, kayak kita, kayak kita astronot!"

last night
H: "Hey!"
M [this time didn't say anyhting, just this..]: *smiling very wide*
H; "Hey!"
M: *smiling even wider*
H: "Kenapa?"
M: *smiling like the first one*

why in the world, a people like me does exist?
sleep talking, astronaut, dip legs into ice cream, smiling saying nothing.

what's wrong with me hei?

less worry is ....

2005-10-20T04:12:00.000-07:00

so i've got this massive problem, if i could call it problem.
for me i like to call it an expensive lesson instead.
not really a lesson though because this was happening when i was just being honest.
so just name it s h i t.
australian government screwed me up.
they made me paid certain amount of money.
f c u k.

when i got this letter, i was at home by myself.
i read it carefully, and i felt so bad.
almost faint, naah, kidding, just felt so angry actually.
didn't know what to do, confuse and sort of kinda feeling.
i was so reactive, called friends, try to find out what happened.
so typical panic circumstances.
i got some answers, and they said this kinda problem happens all the time.
i couldn't explain all the details here.
but if any of you who read this and so curious, i'm more than happy to tell the story.
because it's not the problem that i want to write, but the process of solving it.
ah, just keep reading ...

anyway
when adit got home from school, straight away i cried like hell.
no no, not because i was sad [sometimes people mix up why girls cry, as far as i'm concern, most girls cry because they're angry, and yes some because they're sad or whatever], so i was just so b l o o d y angry.
it's so typical me, angry so much can't stand it, cry is always the answer.
and i felt better afterwards as always.

the whole night we talked about this, the options and stuff like that.
basically, we're agreed to pay off and forget about this.
sure i wanted to over it as soon as i can.
but i know myself, once i got into problem normally it would carry on and on and on.

but IT WASN'T.
the next day, finished work i met naoko my japanese friend and sissel the norwegian.
those two girls are people who i talk to most of the time, and i could say, they're so me and i'm so them.
sometimes naive but realistic at the same time, laid back and easy.
naoko's respons so kicked out!
when i told her, she was just smiling, said,"fuck off, it happens all the time, just pay and forget it!"
sissel's one,"oh shit, what's wrong with them?" and in couple minutes we changed to other topic.
yeah i know, we are swearing a lot, and most of the time because of this stupid australian system.

so i'm over it less than 24 hours.
i was asking myself, wow, how could i have done this?
this is not me.
but, may be just like mom used to say to me.
"oouuw, my baby is growing up!"

so come to think of it, it might be true.
lia or
yulia or
jujul or
whatever you like to call me
has grown up.

so conclusion so far,
less worry is maturity.
not sure yet though
but i just want to put it that way.
can i?

prihatiningsih

2005-10-02T22:39:00.000-07:00

...
...
bom lagi
...
...
bom lagi
...
...
prihatin
...
...

i wrong

2005-09-23T16:15:00.000-07:00

sometimes you think you know where you are headed
you think you know what each day will bring
you think there will be a breath to follow this breath
it has always been that way before
you think that lunch will follow breakfast
and sometime later dinner will naturally appear
you think you know that the sky is blue and that trees are green
and that life will go on quite smoothly forever
like infinite ripple of turquoise ribbon
but sometimes you are wrong

it headed the other way around
and mess up all the comfortness
and sometimes nothing you can do
it's funny how things work in this bloody world

dedicated to piece of writing "so...."
at nanda's [a-person-that-i-used-to-meet-every-single-weekdays-
and-sometimes-weekend] blog

krecep krecep

2005-09-19T00:46:00.000-07:00

krecep krecep itu semacam kata kerja [atau kata benda?]. situasi ini terjadi apabila sesuatu yang terjadi sangat menyentuh hati. gejalanya pertama adalah jantung berdegup kencang [atau malah kadang melambat] dilanjutkan dengan linangan air mata.

kalau situasinya mendukung, maka bisa diekspresikan secara terbuka, misalnya di acara perpisahan, melihat kesuksesan orang lain, melihat teman menikah, atau ketika diri sendiri dinikahi orang [???].

dan tidak bisa diekspresikan secara terbuka ketika situasi tidak memungkinkan, seperti nonton film cengeng di bioskop bersama bos [adeeuh?!!], berita duka, atau diputusin pacar yang adalah gitaris dan ternyata gitar itu sudah tidak lagi dipakai untuk membelai kita melainkan membelai cewek lain.

hari ini lagi lagi gue ngalamin krecep krecep.
karena ngebaca postingan di blog tetangga.
ini adalahh blog milik salah satu dari 3 anggota jack in the box yang paling preman,
gue yang paling pemalu [krik krik krik] dan satu lagi cowok yang paling manja.
oiya, btw, jack in the box adalah perkumpulan dari pemberita muda berbakat.
terutama berbakat dalam hal main jack in the box [???].

ini dia link ke blog de' yarra [salah satu jack in the box itu]..
http://www.dweebstarr.blogspot.com
dan postingannya berjudul.. kangen yulia...

tuh kan..
krecep krecep..

annoyed

2005-09-13T01:57:00.000-07:00

had nothing to do
got home and watch a dvd
this movie i borrowed from a friend
i dont want to mention the tittle

but i dont know why
i get annoyed by this movie
annoying feeling that you cant ignore
even with sex i suppose

it's just annoy me so much
i dont know why

my self

2005-09-13T01:53:00.000-07:00

i enjoy most of the time
when i do things by myself
i think that's why i love sleeping

service

2005-09-08T04:58:00.000-07:00

this is about the regular customers who are sometimes make my day full of greens, orange and yellow or just pissed me off.

mr. wearing orange glow in the dark vest
this guy maybe early 30's with brunette hair and always smiling and blinking every time i finish repeat the order.
order: noodles with chicken no vegies in satay sauce with a large bottle of coke

mr. salad maniac
mid 50's, with glasses, kinda conventional, looks like senior worker and will mumbling, why why oh why, the salad has sold out, i should have came earlier and fade out...

mr. number one
so we always put numbers on the order so it's easy to call them when the meal is ready. this guy, mid 40's, with nice business suite and grey hair, slim and always smile from 10 metres distance and obsessing his order will always coincidentally on number one. sometimes my manager works this thing out, even though it's in the number 54 or whatever just for the sake of customer service.

ms. nasty
so there are two shops of spice box, my work place in the city and the other one in high point [area]. this woman, i don't know may be she's a noodles lover [or maniac] so she often comes to both shop. and what she always does is complaining about the shop in high point, that it doesn't taste the same like in the city one, it's too salty, it was something wrong, bla, bla, bla, oh please just eat it!

mrs. philipino
politely she always asks how am i doing, and then she says it's nice day outside [even if it was windy that can blow you away], and the she orders for rice paper wraps chicken with peanut sauce and then left. reminds me of my mother, she looks like indonesian though but she is philipino..

ms. blonde with a not on her chin
when she comes to the register, she's just standing there and me or my friends will write down the order straight away since all of us know what does she want because she eats at our place every single day and the same order. it's the gluten free meal.

and still so many of them that i cant remember, but now i have this hospitality smile [fake smile], because people can't be happy everyday. sometimes you just want to give them evil look because some of them tend to complaining small things like "i said i didn't want carrot in my meal, why there is carrot in it ?" oow, it's just a small piece of carrot, it's only 2 cm length and not even 2 mm width.

now i know why they give me evil look when i am eating at some places and start complaining my food, why the egg was too cooked, i ordered half cooked. now i will just keep my mouth shut if it's just small mistake and yet still edible, it's just annoying for them and it might ruin their mood which leads to another mistakes.

oh customer service oh ...
i am enjoying it now
but i will have enough later
i know someday
and when the time comes
which means
i have to go back to the box
the box of industry
to survive

i'm in a holiday
parapapa
parapapa

white

2005-09-08T02:42:00.000-07:00

anyway, it's been ages, i haven't dropped any writings into my own blog. myself, who was committed to consider writing as brushing teeth, i mean the frequency, but turn to be kinda "pura-pura dungu' not owning any blog, what if it turned to be not having any tooth. fool! anyway..

so i've just bought this wrist ban "making poverty history", the white one [no choices of colour anyway]. i bought at the shop in the city, it's like official shop for this campaign. let's broke down this thing.

first of all, the wrist ban itself. i know it's kinda everywhere, i don't know exactly who created or started making this ban so popular. might be nike, which obviously everybody's wearing it, it's written on it, like a word which symbolise sportiveness whatever. and then suddenly it became everywhere, like a must wearing thing. reminds me to spiky things and then wrist ban for patients in the hospital. this wrist ban comes in different colours everywhere and sure with different words. and sometimes it seems so corny, etc.

and next, the make poverty history jargon. it came from the live 8, sir bob geldof and friends were trying to spread this idea to the world. i don't know though who was the exact pioneer, but never mind, it popped up, and just exist. it's good though, they try to make it as simple as it could be, because obviously it's not easy to make this P history.

so people now is wearing this white ban, written make P history, and i'm just wondering what are they thinking. so this is my imaginary interview [since i haven't done any real interview, hiks], with imaginary details. the question is why are you wearing this?

nomiko, waitress at o-katto restaurant
"hmm you know, we have to make this happen. fair trade, drop the debt and you know on the other side of this earth people are still starving while we're here taking everything for granted, i just don't get it when my friends said that i'm just pathetic naive idealist kinda person"

dove geldove, shop assistant at "rhyme" cafe
"what i'm thinking is, click, why my tears always drop when i see the documentary, click, of people who are starving and can't get any education, click, while mr.bush is still busy, click, with sending troops to iraq, click, and waste so much money for that stupid useless thing, click, and i just feel, [started crying], i feel, click, hik, hik, i feel that i have to do something, click, even small things like buying this wrist ban, click, and by the time you stop asking me question, 10 kids in africa died, click."

keytong, security at tattoo shop
"it's just like a tattoo, sometimes it's meaningful, and sometimes it's just for posers. it depends though, if you're wearing it because at least you know what does it mean, so it's good, and if you bought it just because you want to get rid of small changes, you better jump in to yarra river. i know i'm exaggerating, but i tend to have this kinda extreme thought for this kinda people"

fragiles, admin at an insurance company
"i don't know, i think white suits my skin colour and especially today it fits my flat flowery shoes that i bought in that cool vintage store, it looks bright and clear. i just love it. muah!"

corgans, manager at a big famous record store
"most rock bands do, so i have to follow, you know, i always admire them, they have this kinda soulful movement that i just cant ignore. i know it's kinda selling out or whatever, but it is a good campaign, you reckon? yes i think so, so hell yeah, i'm wearing it now, i hope it will kick ass and i'm gonna ask my staffs to wear this ban"

lefty, volunteer at state library
"we have to encourage john howard to come to the meeting, we have to stand for the right of undeveloped country, do not let them get sucked by this so-called powerful country who is trying to make them bend on their knees asking for debt whatever, while this rich countries only donate few percent of that national gross bla bla, well, they can do better though, so free trade is a must, oh yeah, i wanna say hi to my friends who are still fighting for this, keep going, i'm gonna stay here optimistically that it's gonna happen"

candy, picnic-ers
"sorry, the reason why i'm wearing this is just for my self, i keep it here [pointed at her chess]"

so my interview was ended when the sky became orange, and i just felt wanna go home and started pouring this annoying feeling to the screen of this computer so when tomorrow my imaginary editor asking for result, i just can do what Candy did. but i will pointed at my head instead. cause this idea make P history still blurry buried in my head. i know that i can do small things that hopefully could help them, but i haven't made any move, just moving my fingers to make this no-where-to-go piece of writing. and oh yeah, just to make a whatever-writing to ease the guilty of haven't done any and a lil bit productive kinda feeling. hup fush!

sepasang kaki

2005-07-28T01:27:00.000-07:00

duh sejak mendarat di kota ini, frekuensi penggunaan kaki meningkat tajam.
bagusnya, bagian kaki jadi kenceng plus sehat tentunya. apalagi konsumsi ngerokok yang menurun drastis karena selain mahal, tak ada indoor smoking di sini.

kerja hospitality selain menuntut kecekatan ala pramuka dan juga konsentrasi penuh, pun menantang kaki untuk berdiri berjam-jam tanpa ampun. di bulan-bulan pertama, duh kaki pengen dicopot bentar, terus dititip di tempat pijet beberapa saat. lama-lama biasa juga.

kebiasaan buruk baru, minta pijet tiap malem sebelum tidur. kaki menyilang dengan hormat dan teriak,"biasa!" ke telinga hubby. untung punya hubby teladan se-kecamatan st.kilda, jadi aja nggak ada masalah dengan ketidak semena-menaan.

kebiasaan buruk baru [nggak baru2 amat] lainnya adalah pemilihan sepatu yang enak. modalnya ada di kaki tentunya perlu dibalut dengan sepatu nyaman lan sedap dipandang mata supaya hentakan kaki meyakinkan. *y.right*

all star chuck taylor [astc] jadi pilihan. yey, kemana aja hari gini baru mulai ngumpulin astc. orang lain malah udah ada yang nama tengahnya aja "all star". masalahnya sekarang terasa lebih affordable dengan keringat melayani customer di restaurant.

jadi? yah sedang dalam masa pengumpulan. terus? yah gitu. gantung.

shitty or not shitty

2005-07-28T00:39:00.000-07:00

working in hospitality area for me is just fun.

although i know it's a shitty job compare to office job. and if i worked in an office i might earn more money and got this status.

but hell status, i just like what i'm doing now, working as a staff in a take away restaurant.

many of my friends ask me to try to apply for another job related to my skill. but, i don't know, i don't feel like working in an office since i had that bad experience working there.

the story started when i applied to this community magazine, i got the job as an editor, effortless. not try to be stuck up or anything, but i got the job easily. the first time i got in the office i had this weird feeling. the office itself is not a typical magazine office, of course it's a migration consultant office which has to share a small room for the magazine team. i was thinking of a team [more than one person], with cool people. it was not like that. there was a girl who manages everything include editorial, marketing, and administration. i thought, that's ok, may be not that much work to do.

i worked as a part time editor. cool, then i didn't have to come everyday so i won't get stuck in this formal office. but still, since we agreed that i would be in charge in the editorial department so i have to come everyday to make sure everything ok. the wages itself was ok though. but the boss, ouw my God. actually he's ok, but he's just nasty. and the worst thing is he doesn't have any idea to manage a magazine and he lacks of experience in media industry. i'm not saying that i know everything but at least i know how the process piece by piece how to manage the idea, execute it and make sure the printing company is doing ok.

all he can do is complaining. why is it like this and like that. one day, he didn't agree with the idea of the cover that i proposed. but then as a normal staff, i asked him, what's your idea, and he was angry, he said i'm wasting his time and i've been working ridiculously. i was so shocked that i wanted to throw the ashtray on his desk. and i said to him, if you think i'm wasting his time, so i can leave now. he felt sorry, he said he has so many thing to do that made him crazy. i was just upset. because that wasn't the first time he treated me like that. this guy, i hate him so much and i hate him because he's just immature and money oriented in a worst way i've ever known. that's true, i'm not exaggerating or anything.

then i resigned peacefully.

i just don't get it. not that i don't understand a working life that sometimes somehow might put me in a shitty situation. point taken. i understand that. not that i want to avoid that kinda problem dealing with other people.

i know that i was working in this almost perfect office in Jakarta. with cool people that i could learned a lot from them, and the office culture was so me which was so kindergarten aura. hehehe. i know that it will be hard for me to get in the same office in the future but i've opened myself to a new life and environment.

i just don't wanna have a nasty boss whose fart and burb habits. ups. but it happened. hehehe. bugger off.

now i'm happy with my job. i know i shouldn't have to waste my time. I should have been sticked on media industry so then i gain more experience and not to let my brain freezing. i know, i know. i just wanna do it in my own way.

only if working in australian media didn't have a requirement like you had to be an australian citizen or holded permanent residence visa.

ah anyway, i'm doing what i want to do. that's more than enough. call me stubborn.

stay or not to stay

2005-07-27T03:28:00.000-07:00

updated: not to stay

three months ago, I worked at this Indonesian community magazine owned by a chinese guy who also owns a migration agent. I met an Indonesian girl who had been working there for years [she’s just resigned bout 2 months ago]. Me and hubby we’ve never thought that we have this possibility to stay in aus more than 1,5 years [the duration of hubby’s course]. So the consideration to stay here longer has never crossed in our mind.

Until this Indonesian girl said to me that I might be eligible to apply for permanent residence visa. I probably could have enough point. Oh yeah, it’s all about points. So, since I’m married, has a bachelor degree in journalism and also have 24 months working experiences in media industry, I might have enough point. But then I had to take a translator test to increase my point a lil bit more.

Happily I told hubby about this, so we agreed to move on and willing to pay for the test fee and bla bla bla other requirements. So I sat on the test. Paid $400. I heard the rumour that the test is sucks. Very hard and to past the test I had to doing it perfectly. Hell yeah, I don’t care, worth to try. The test itself quite ok, I felt that I did that properly.

While waiting for the result, deg-deg-plas-harap-harap-cemas. I kept thinking, what if I past the test and then apply for the visa and granted. Pffuiihh, I have to stay at least 5 years or more. Because so much money that I had to pay and don’t wanna be wasted. But, then half of my heart still left in Jakarta. Although the city sucks with all the traffic and pollution bla bla bla, but I think the city has everything, my family, friends and food to die for. At that time, to be honest, I haven’t sure yet to stay longer in aus..

But on the other hand, I really wanna have new experience which I believe that I’ll gain something. Of course, Melbourne is one of the most liveable city in the world, so one day I have children, at least they will have a better environment. I’m not saying Jakarta is not good for them, but I have to admit it that Melbourne is probably [not sure yet] better for their education, at least they can run around the street or park or any public space without worrying that they could get sick easily cause of the weather and pollution. And they might see more people since the will have to get in public transport more often instead of private car.

By the way, that’s just a wild thought.

One nice day, in the morning, on my way to work, there’s a mail in my mailbox. The white envelope with the translator test logo on the corner. Here it is, I said to myself. I opened carefully, and obviously written that I FAILED. I kept walking to the station since I had to catch the train. I was walking with hubby. Hubby a lil bit upset, but I felt ok. A lil bit upset just because I couldn’t prove to myself that I might have passed the test, not like what the rumour said. I don’t know, I didn’t feel that sad knowing that I’ll be in Jakarta soon next year. I texted few of my friends. And after an hour I’ve already forgot bout that.

And the funny thing was, after I realize that I won’t stay here that long, of course I want to have the most out of the time I have left. So I started shopping and decorated our small apartment with cool stuffs. Went to Ikea and bought a lot of stuffs which are nothing in function but everything in estetical side. Yeah right, like I know how to design the interior. But at least, I don’t miss the chance to do what I want to do.

A week after, hubby managed to buy a bike and he said he will ride it until the end of his course. Go hubby, I hope that will be one of the highlight of his days along the year.

Me? I wanna take some photography courses and writing courses and might be a business course to make myself more marketable in certain way. Huhuhuy. And of course, travelling around this down under land. And more concerts please. Yippie. Meanwhile, working hard to make it happen which I don’t mind.

Ouw I just need to thank to the Creator. I still remember when we’re about to leave Jakarta that I just wanna stay at home and to have a lil bit fun considering the budget. I’ve never imagined that I could get a job with funny interesting people and of course earn some money so I can afford more than I’ve ever imagined.

So, destination 2006: Jakarta.

Hubby now is considering to get a job in S’pore after he graduated, but I don’t wanna think about it yet, since I just wanna enjoy Melbourne for a while.

In the name of tahu goreng, pisang goreng, sate yang lewat dan mie ayam pake sambel, I wanna go home.

earn and end the time

2005-07-05T03:36:00.000-07:00

it's just another day ... birthday is just one day when your great companions give you nice sincere greetings which make you smile and feel that the warmth of life is running in your blood.

but i don't feel like a celebration of getting a year older.
i've just found out that year, how old, age or even time dimension are not the answer of everything.

our dearest friend, Destiadi Nugroho has just passed away yesterday.
the news shocked me, shocked me who gonna earn one more year on the next day.

my deepest condolences.
i know somehow you are watching us Mas. and if you were, i just wanna say hi.

pieces of paper with certain numbers called money

2005-06-10T03:34:00.000-07:00

me and hubby, we always have some plans to go traveling and have started setting up the destinations, budget, and of course wondering how fun it could be. i always grab some tour brochures everytime i pass the travel agency everywhere. especially after work, grab some brochures, read them in the tram way home, get home, throw away my shoes [not that dramatic though, just want to describe how excited i am], put ice cream in a cup, start browsing the brochure. it's everything, isn't it? i mean the feeling that you'll be in that places shown at the brochures.

so talking bout doing traveling, we're talking bout the budget, money, piece of paper with certain numbers, aight?

since few months ago, i have these jobs, i earn some money. sometimes i got paid by cheque [magz job] and got cash for the hospitality job. few days before the pay day [lucky, come in the same day for those 2 jobs, every 2 weeks], i always promise myself to save couple dollars from the cheque since it will come to my bank account straight away, and spend the cash one for daily expenses.

but i don't know why, it always failed.

the cash will suddenly disappeared, and as long as i can remember, always goes to [mostly] chocolates, ciggarettes [only at the weekend though], tuesday dinner [this is like a regular one, spend tuesday night everyweek having dinner with some indo friends] and having some happy drinks with the other bule's friends at the weekend [also reguler events]. these are something that i can not avoid coz me and hub want to have the best time of our life in melb, so we don't want to be that kinda always-counting-every-couple-dollars and miss our precious time with friends who always give us highlight of our day.

and the cheque, at one time quickly changes into some cute accesories, fashion stuffs and not to mention some CD's and magazines that i can't stand not to buy. although it appeared to be cheque but easily to be spent coz you can do sort of eftpos, debit, whatsoever.

so those money that i got for two weeks working always go easily. and another weeks coming, starts on monday, in the morning, walking to the train station keep tellling myself, you have to save money, coz you want to be in that places shown at traveling brochures. and, you know how what happened next at the pay day.

so i envy some of my friends who can go traveling because they are really organized with their financial planning, save some money, and having their best time. but i also envy them who can easily go traveling because suddenly some money surprisingly appeares in their account and that was sent from home. lucky you.

so now i promise myself, in the name of those places that i want to spend summer time with hubby, i will save some money and start forgetting that tempting shops who always make me broke. yeah right ...

mobil

2005-05-26T02:52:00.000-07:00

conversation in english, terjemahan bebas

"caranya nyampe sini gimana?
gue bingung kalo nebeng temen,
jadi nggak tau tram stop terdekat di mana,
nomer berapa, naik tram no berapa?"

"ah elo repot amat sih,
pokoknya tinggal turun di depan kfc,
terus belok kiri! jelas kok"

"nggak jelas kali kalo buat laki gue,
secara perjalanan dia cuman rumah-kampus,
daerah sini mana dia tau, kan jauh,
mendingan tau tram stopnya,
jadi lebih jelas."

"ya pokoknya di situ deh,
ntar juga keliatan, duh, gue udah laper banget nih."

dengan sedikit hopeless gue jalan sambil nyari-nyari di mana sih tram stopnya?

"udah dateng laki elo?"

"belumlah, dia pasti bingung, kesian, gue harus guide dia by phone,
dia kan naik public transport."

"lho? gue kira dia naik mobil, mobil elo emang ke mana?

"mobil? kami nggak punya mobil."

"kok bisa? you're Indonesian. how come?"

tiaraaaappp dulu aah.

panci [dalam arti sebenenarnya]

2005-05-26T02:14:00.000-07:00

nggak punya microwave.
nggak punya rice cooker.

cuman ada 3 panci.
ukuran gede, diameter 50 cm, dengan dua pegangan pendek.
ukuran sedang, diameter 25 cm, dengan satu pegangan panjang.
ukuran kecil, ukuran 15 cm, dengan satu pegangan sedang.

yang gede dipake buat masak sop, panci full, sekali masak sekalian banyak, untuk dimakan beberapa kali dan nggak dipindahin ke mangkok atau pinggan, supaya nggak banyak yang kotor dan mesti cuci, dan supaya tiap mau makan sop tinggal diangetin aja.

yang sedang, ukuran paling pas buat masak nasi [yap, akhirnya terbiasa masak nasi tanpa rice cooker, cuman direbus biasa aja, tapi hasil maksimal, pulen tenan!], sekali masak banyak bisa buat makan 2 hari, beberapa porsi. jadi emang nasi nggak dipindah ke mangkok nasi.

ukuran kecil, paling cukup buat ngangetin masakan berkuah dalam porsi kecil, atau pun kalo masak indomie yah paling cuman muat satu, pake telor, dan sedikit sayuran.

setiap pagi bangun dalam keadaan harus siap masak buat makan siang dan bikin sarapan, dan semuanya harus dikerjakan dalam waktu singkat dan efektif. kadang begitu mau bikin sarapan, ah ternyata mau masak indomie buat 2 orang, pake telor dan sayuran, OOW, panci sedang masih penuh dengan nasi yang belum abis, panci gede masih ada sop buat makan siang, dan panci kecil kekecilan, bakal mbleber kemana-mana kalo pake panci kecil. kalo dimasak satu persatu ah, lama amat. mau pake panci sedeng, masak mindahin nasi dulu sih, terus pancinya harus dicuci lagi, mana air dingin banget lagi winter gini, perut udah laper, pengen diisi indomie anget, pake telor dan agak pedes. this is one case, one situation, dan masih ada beberapa situasi lainnya di mana panci kecil kekecilan dan panci sedeng dipake nasi dan panci gede kegedean.

ya udah, beli panci satu lagi, khusus buat masak nasi, jadi panci sedang bisa lebih mobile gitu.
hubby nggak setuju. dia bilang maksimalin dulu yang ada. we have to be efficient, as long as there are stuffs that we can use, although with more effort, no need to buy a new one.

gue bilang, kitchen is my area, my kingdom, i wanna be happy in my space although i have to spend more. i'll look after my budget, no need to worry about it.

then he goes, "i know that you can buy everything you want, but you have to think what you need instead of what you want." and i said, "i 've never worry bout what i spend for my happiness and my happiness, will be yours as well at the end."

that's one of -we name it- morning drama.
after that so typical morning conversation and then laugh, have breakfast, take a shower and start day activity.

one nice day starts from the kitchen. the happy sad kitchen.

fall into a deep hole, sad, bad, low, down

2005-05-12T18:26:00.000-07:00

pernah nggak bingung dengan ekspresi orang atau paling nggak dengan bagaimana seseorang mendeskripsikan dirinya dan pada akhirnya: karyanya?

sering kali gue menemukannya dalam lirik lagu, film, buku atau dalam obrolan sehari-hari, ekspresi atau deskripsi orang yang terobsesi dengan kematian. itu orangnya beneran terobsesi dengan kematian atau karena terobsesi dengan kematian adalah sesuatu yang cool atau keren atau extraordinary gitu sih?

nggak cuman obsesi dengan kematian tapi juga secara intensif menunjukkan ke-depresi-an, kesedihan, keterpurukan, dll. emang sih seringnya muncul dalam lagu, film atau buku, kalau dalam keseharian paling 1 atau 2 orang lah. tapi beneran nggak sih penulisnya ngalamin itu, atau paling nggak konstruksi sosial dalam dirinya adalah hal-hal "susah" itu?

soalnya kalo dalam lagu, musik dan film, kalo emang susah dan depresi kenapa tuh media publikasi itu bisa sampe dirilis yah? bukannya itu sesuatu yang menyenangkan [nggak depresi lagi dong!]? maksudnya, kan kalo rilis media gitu, bukannya hari-hari penuh dengan kebahagiaan [yap secara teknis], ngundang-ngundang orang, ntar pas launching pake baju apa, sepatu apa, etc? kok sempet yah, bukannya udah terlalu sibuk dengan kedepresian dan keobsesian dengan kematian itu? terus kenapa mesti dipublikasikan sih?

in a way gue suka sih emang nonton film-film yang depresi gitu, atau denger musik dengan notasi yang depresi juga dan mempengaruhi mood untuk jadi low gitu dan bikin nagih untuk jadi low terus. gue kadang suka karena itu menimbulkan pertanyaan, bukan karena gue merasa ada dalam kondisi yang sama atau setuju dengan ekspresi itu. atau jangan-jangan orang-orang yang sekarang terobsesi dengan kematian dan depresi terpengaruh oleh karya-karya yang diciptakan oleh orang-orang sebelumnya? apalagi kalo akhirnya si penulis lagu dan film atau buku itu sangat diakui eksistensinya dan kalo nggak suka karya mereka berarti nggak keren, gitu yah?

gue kok lebih suka dengan orang yang mengekspresikan kemarahan. agak lebih bisa diterima [which is mungkin buat yang emotionally wise, balance, whatsoever, they would say ngapain juga marah2]. dalam karya foto, film, buku dan lagu, kemarahan masih lebih masuk akal untuk diapresiasi karena sering kali adalah sebagai bentuk perlawanan atau sekedar ekspresi aja titik. gue akui gue juga ngerasa lebih produktif kalo lagi marah, terutama nulis dan motret. tapi kan itu marah, bukan pengen mati.

terus sekarang gue perhatikan si sosok yang marah-obsesi dengan kematian-depresi etc adalah tidak berlatarbelakang yang signifikan gitu yah. kayak misalnya band. banyak band terdiri dari orang-orang yang kehidupannya baik-baik aja, lebih dari baik malah. orang tua support, secara finansial terjamin, pergaulan ok, pembuktian diri ok, tapi kok bikin lagu tentang terobsesi dengan kematian. asal muasalnya dari mana yah? konstruksi sosialnya [apa sih gue konstruksi sosial melulu?] kayaknya nggak nyambung gitu.

kalo depresi karena terobsesi dengan drugs, weittss ntar dulu, itu beda lagi. itu namanya nggak sensitif. bukannya apa-apa, sok bersih atau sok aktivis atau sok tau-karena-belum-pernah-nyobain aja, buset hari gini terobsesi sama drugs. apa kabar tuh orang-orang yang terobsesi -pengen makan- di sudan, afrika, timur tengah dll? anyway, ini nggak nyambung. jadi kalo depresi dan pengen mati karena drugs nggak masuk itungan ya, masih banyak yang lebih sedih, yang makan aja susah. back to ekspresi dalam karya-karya itu ya.

bukan band aja, tapi juga buku, dan film. foto masih lebih blak-blakan terkadang, masih sulit menelikungnya.

kesimpulan, itu orang-orang beneran pengen mati sekarang juga gitu maksudnya? gimana sih? pengen mati=keren? depresi=keren? gue kok nggak ngerti. atau gue aja yang nggak keren karena nggak bisa mengerti mereka?

terus kenapa juga gue siang-siang gini mikirin beginian. bukannya mestinya mikirin cover. cover bulan ini apa ya bagusnya? apa ya?

that text made me blue

2005-04-28T03:56:00.000-07:00

"lia bagaimana kabarmu trims ya tas nya bagus sekali langsung mama pake ke undangan indah sedang ke aceh satu minggu mama rindu sama lia ingat makan sushi di sogo mama nangis waktu sms ini kamu yang bikin mama ceria bukan berarti yang lain tidak mungkin karena dulu kamu menyusu dua tahun sama mama bagaimana idjasahmu sudah sampai belum sudah dulu ya salam sayang buat adit"

ibunya
+628159003173
24/4/2005, 5:16 PM
type: sms

sms dari ibunya [yang masih aja belum pake spasi setelah sekian lama], yang bikin hatinya sini sejenak jadi berhenti mendadak, matiin rokok mendadak, ngeletakin gelas pergelangan tangan lemes. bikin langit di federation square meleleh. kalo aja dia tau seringnya mata ini krecep-krecep tiap denger suara dia pas nelpon tapi gue selalu pretend bahwa gue kangen tapi biasa aja sambil nahan suara yang udah berat ["apa kabar nak? sehat di sana?"]. kangen punggungnya dikusuk-kusuk sampe ngantuk. misyu momi.

such combination

2005-04-04T06:07:00.000-07:00

So, now I'm sitting here. Wondering and wondering how all these could've ever happened to me?

Duduk di meja yang so tipikal ini lagi, di depan komputer kantor lagi [dengan monitor yang agak canggihan-flat]. Dengan beberapa windows terbuka: yahoo messenger, detik.com. kompas.co.id, beberapa email, etc. Sambil sesekali menyeruput teh anget dan biskuit asin. Yang bikin beda adalah surrounding yang mute, nggak ada permainan jack in the box di sini, nggak ada fashion editor yang biasanya langsung menghangatkan suasana dengan cerita yang penuh dengan visualisasi mantap. Nggak ada jack in the box yang begitu nyampe kantor perutnya langsung mules dan pengen setor. Dan nggak ada yang lain-lainnya lagi.

But the rest is pretty similar. Berkutat dengan tulisan news, interview, laporan utama, etc. So, what the hell am i doing here? Jauh-jauh ke down under land yah kembali untuk mengerjakan sesuatu yang sama. Well, nggak juga sih. Karena pagi ini, I've just started something that really really new for me. And it was so interesting.

Berangkat dari rumah jam 10. Tram gejes gejes, alias lambat berjalan tapi pasti. Mampir ke kantor bentar ngedrop burn-an CD hasil liputan Sabtu malem. Semacam liputan yang agak sedikit memalukan untuk disebutkan di sini. Karena it was a live concert of one of the famous Indonesian band. Ah, sudahlah. Pokoknya pagi ini udah nyetor foto-foto hasil liputan yang karena filenya kegedean jadi nggak bisa dikirim ke anak desainer lewat email.

Beres ngedrop foto di kantor, sedikit tunggang langgang ngejar tram ke city. Deg deg plas, rasanya dada ini [?!]. Karena pekerjaan main dapur-dapuran ini, honestly baru pertama kalinya, agak norak, nggak pa pa lah. Jadi begitu nyampe di sana [QV, city], langsung ketemu pak bos [Malaysian] yang dengan sejumlah kru masak memasak lainnya sudah siap. Jadi pertama, gue harus makan siang dulu yang udah disediain sama mereka. Dikasih waktu 15 menit. Waktu abis dan makanannnya unfinished [seperti biasa].

Allen [pak bos], langsung ngasih kostum yang cukup menarik, celemek warna hitam dan topi [berbentuk semacam topi kung fu] yang juga warna hitam. Dalam hitungan menit, dia langsung ngejelasin cara nutup box noodle, jenis-jenis mie yang ada di situ, arti-arti dari singkatan dan menu di tempat itu. Jam 11 teng mulai, rasanya nggak susah-susah amat. Tapi Thin [Vietnamese] dan Muti [Myanmar] cuman bisa senyum-senyum. Kata mereka, "Just wait until lunch time!"

Hari ini official kerjaan adalah ngambil mie sesuai order, nutup box dan neriakin customer sesuai nomer order. Interesting! Jam 12 teng, customer berdatangan dan nggak berhenti sampai jam 2. Tangan ini rasanya nggak disuruh gerak, udah bisa gerak sendiri. Kaki jelas kemeng, bediri 3 jam non stop. Muka jangan tanya, keringetan tenan, cuman semeter dari kompor. But. it was a good fun though. Seperti di film-film, semua yang kerja di situ, soo friendly, funny dan bubbly. Mereka nyanyi dan even colek-colekan during kerja.

Jam 3 pas, Allen nyuruh gue cabut karena shift gue hari ini 4 jam. Setelah becanda dan chat sana sini, gue beberes, ngelepas celemek dan topi, ambil tas dan langsung keluar. Begitu cek mobile ternyata udah ada 3 missed call dan 4 sms. Ups, ternyata temen kantor mulai kelabakan karena ini minggu deadline. Telepon balik dan memutuskan untuk mampir ke kantor walau hari ini bukan hari official kerja di situ.

Editan udah beres, lay out-an hampir beres, tinggal cover. Diskusi cover beres. And now i'm sitting here, doing this blog. For me, today is such a "one" day. Satu hari yang memorable karena melakukan sesuatu aktivitas yang bener-bener baru dan sekaligus hari dimana aktivitas lama diulang kembali.

Staf di sebuah restoran take away di city: Senin Rabu Kamis
Editor di sebuah majalah Indonesia di Melbourne: Selasa Jumat
Jadi istri yang baik dengan spend good weekend with lovely hubby: Sabtu Minggu

I'm just wondering, how all of these could've ever happened to me?

Y

Oiya, tadi malem R.E.M was sooooooo amazing. Michael Stipe is sexy, now I know why.

menggigil dan pingsan [kombinasi menarik]

2005-03-30T18:57:00.000-08:00

Untuk yang kedua kalinya, mempermalukan diri sendiri. Nggak tau kenapa, begitu sampe kantor badan langsung menggigil tak terkendalikan. Padahal hari ini 29 derajat, matahari menyengat.Tapi sejak turun dari tram, kaki dan tangan rasanya dingin. Dan udah jaketan juga gitu yah, tetep menggigil.

Seperti biasa, dateng kepagian, kantor belum dibuka juga, gue turun lagi dan memutuskan untuk berdiri di tempat yang kena sinar matahari paling banyak. Teteup mengigil. Wah, langsung khawatir, jangan-jangan kayak dulu nih, tepar di rumah orang, tepatnya di ruang tamu rumah nara sumber yang mau diwawancara [ah ngaku aja: pingsan di rumah Tata Dado!].

Akhirnya temen kantor, Judith [Indonesia] dan Nauko [gadis Jepang] dateng dan nyamperin. Mereka nuntun gue naik dan duduk di sofa kantor. Makin menjadi-jadi menggigilnya. Tambah mual. Oow, apakah ini tanda-tanda dari Adit kecil yang waktu itu gagal di rem. Nggak tau juga sih. Kalo dikasih Alhamdulillah. Tapi akhirnya muntah beneran. Ok, legaan, dan memutuskan untuk nggak duduk di dalam kantor, tapi di bawah [di pinggir jalan, cari tempat nggak AC].

Setelah angetan, naik lagi dan dengan baiknya Ferlina [Indonesia] ngebukain ruangan bos [yang lagi keluar kota] dan nyuruh gue tidur di situ. Sebenernya dari tadi emang udah pengen ngegelepar aja gitu kayak di Trax. Tapi mana mungkin di kantor ini. Lagian ntar dikira nggak tau diri pula, anak baru kok kebanyakan gaya. Akhirnya tidurlah sekitar 2 jam [yap selama itu], setelah dicecoki obat Chinese yang maha pahit dan teh hijau. Astaga naga raksasa pahitnya.

Sekarang udah mendingan. Alhamdulillah nggak sampe pingsan. Hp ketinggalan di rumah pula [so tipikal gue]. Tapi mungkin ini semacam wisuda. Tragedi pingsan di rumah Tata Dado itu pun dulu terjadi setelah beberapa saat aja masuk Trax. Dan di kantor ini baru minggu kedua udah hampir pingsan. Semacam inagurasi. Tapi kenapa harus menggigil dan pingsan sih?

Nggak ngerti.

rokok

2005-02-17T17:19:00.000-08:00

Cerita tentang benda kecil yang ngerusak sekaligus ngasih energi dalam waktu yang bersamaan.

Sekitar 2 minggu terakhir di Ind, sempet liburan ke Bali. Liputan sih sebenernya. Suatu malam minggu yang cerah bareng Deasy dan Inge, ceritanya dinner di restoran kecil, di daerah Poppies 2, Legian. Habis makan, banyak banget, kenyang, ngerokok dong paling enak. Rokok masih banyak sih. Tiba-tiba salah satu dari sepasang bule, nyamperin, ngasih tanda pake tangan gitu, kirain mau pinjem korek, taunya minta rokok. Ouw, okey deh, lucu juga. Jarang gitu ada orang yang nggak kenal minta rokok, biasanya minjem korek. Inge 'n Deasy ketawa-ketawa aja. Gue masih mikir. Bukan, bukannya nggak ikhlas. Cuman lucu aja.

Bukan pengalaman pertama sih dimintain rokok. Jaman susah dulu [waktu jadi anak kost-an], satu batang berdua sih asik aja.

Pengalaman berikutnya, baru-baru ini, lagi jalan-jalan di Chapel St. bareng hubby. Ceritanya laper, duduk dulu, di depan semacam kantor Kelurahan gitu. Ngeluarin lunch box, makan deh. Selesai makan, ngerokok lagi. Lagi ngerokok, tiba-tiba ada bule nyamperin. Kayaknya dia semacam lagi sedih, keliatan dari ekspresi mukanya. Dia minta rokok, dengan tanda gerakan tangan. Berusaha sopan, gue kasih lah bungkus rokok gue. Kalo ngasih sebatang aja, yang artinya filternya bakal kena tangan kita, bukankah itu kurang sopan, bukan begitu bukan? Ternyata, gue kasih sama bungkusnya, diambil lho semuanya. Yap, sebungkus. Isinya tinggal sedikit sih. Paling 5-7 batang gitu. Nah, kalo yang ini gue rada nggak ikhlas. Ini kan negeri orang. Yang harga rokok marlboro putih adalah $10= 70rb rupiah saja. Tapi ya sudahlah, gue cuman bisa ngeliat punggung orang itu semakin menjauh dan menjauh. Adit ketawa geli.

Next experience is, suatu weekend yang panas banget, gue dan Adit jalan ke city. Seperti biasa, kami si keluarga super hemat ini, bawa bekel makan siang dari rumah. Asik jalan-jalan, laper. Kami makan di depan State Library. Emang di halaman rumput itu banyak orang duduk-duduk. Sebagian kayaknya imigran gitu. Di sekitar kita banyak orang sliweran main skate. Sampai ada satu bapak-bapak udah agak tua, pake skate juga, dengan gaya agak preman gitu, nanya ke gue. "D'ya have cigies [alias sigis sebutnya, bahasa slang gitu kayaknya, gue nggak ngerti gimana spellingnya]?" Oh, pasti rokok nih maksudnya. Berdasarkan pengalaman sebelumnya, gue jawab, "No, no spare. Sorry." Dan dia pergi gitu aja dengan skatenya. Hari itu gue dapet satu pelajaran lagi. Yep, si sigis itu.

Dan hari ini, ini adalah bungkus terakhir rokok gue. Tadi pagi bangun tidur tinggal 5 batang. Pas Adit mau berangkat ke kampus, gue ikutan jalan keluar, nyari tukeran $1 buat koin nyuci. Adit naik tram, gue jalan balik ke rumah. Dingin bener. Ngerokoklah satu batang. Sampe rumah, abis masukin cucian, si mbak tetangga flat muncul. Dia kehabisan rokok. Minta satu ke gue. Yap, satu batang lenyap. Bikin sarapan, nonton tv, kenyang, pengen ngerokok. Yak, 1 batang lagi hilang. Beres ngerokok, ngetik-ngetik lagi, sambil nungguin cucian beres. Lagi ngetik, tiba-tiba pikiran agak ngaco, pengen ngerokok. Sekarang tinggal 1 batang.

Sebatang terakhir. Why? Karena gue nggak akan beli rokok sampe dapet kerja. Sebungkus rokok di sini, harganya sama dengan beli daging untuk makan 3 hari. Lagi pula emang udah saatnya berhenti.

Lagi mikir kapan ya dapet kerja? Tiba-tiba telepon bunyi. Ternyata dari salah satu publishing agency, yang waktu itu gue lamar untuk posisi pengantar junk mail, paper, etc. Ternyata dia lagi butuh orang untuk sekitar rumah gue. Honornya lumayan banget. Kerjanya cuman sekali seminggu, hari Senin aja, dibayarnya cash. Mulainya Senin, 2 minggu lagi. Senang.

It's a hope for another pack of cigarettes. But, life's not just about a pack of cigarettes, right?

crocodile dundee

2005-02-17T14:57:00.000-08:00

Kemaren, Adit ngajak ke kampus. Ada pemutaran film. Program buat mahasiswa baru. Australian Culture through Film, gitu judulnya. Jadi ada satu volunteer yang jadi penanggung jawab program ini. Tempat nontonnya keren, di theatre class gitu. Sampai jam 6 sore [jadwal pemutaran film] cuman 6 orang yang dateng, ada 1 Indonesia lainnya, 1 cowok Israel dan sisanya Chinese asli dari China. Semua mengenalkan diri, dan nyeritain culture asalnya masing-masing.

Gue pikir, wah bakal keren nih kayaknya film yang diputer. Mungkin semacam dokumenter. Si mas volunteer ini lanjut, nanya hal-hal lain, kayak culture itu apa, being foreigner itu bagaimana, etc. Diskusi yang menyenangkan lah. Nah, tibalah saatnya film akan diputer.

Dan si mas ini akhirnya ngasih tau, film yang akan diputer adalah: CROCODILE DUNDEE.

Ya udah nonton aja.
Mau gimana lagi.

celemek, panci dan afrika

2005-02-16T20:16:00.000-08:00

Lagi masak, sambil nonton tv. Ternyata acaranya Oprah Winfrey show, episode anak-anak Afrika. Gimana mereka struggle dengan HIV, sekolah tanpa seragam dan buku, etc. Dan satu lagi, ini acara tv, pastinya dengan segala dramatisasi. Angle kamera, suara, editan, etc. Dan gue mulai menitikkan air mata ngeliat betapa menderitanya mereka. Mata gue mulai basah, dan gue hapus pake baju. Maksudnya pengen ngelap pake kaos yang gue pake, tapii ternyata kehalang celemek. Dan, wush wush, dalam hitungan beberapa detik, gue terhenyak. Gue nangis karena suatu acara di tv, sambil pake celemek dan megang panci. Astaga oh astaga, gue udah jadi ibu-ibu beneran. Which is okey aja sih. Tapi, ya ampyun, it's so typical, isn't it?